The Edgar Allan Poe School of Government Reform

War Against All Puerto Ricans: Revolution and Terror in America’s Colony

A new method of government reform is needed in Puerto Rico.                                                                    

It seems that politicians in Puerto Rico do not listen to reason.

They only listen to the dictates of their bank accounts, and to the Freudian dynamic of pain and pleasure.

Accordingly, the only way to reform their behavior, is through a compelling application of this Freudian principal.

And that is why we created the Edgar Allan Poe School of Government Reform.

It is a school for politicians, which helps them to do their jobs properly.

Methods for Teaching Politicians

The Pedagogy of the Oppressor requires a unique methodology.

At first we used smart boards, interactive video, computer distance learning…but after much trial and error, the most successful methods were rather old-fashioned.

Lobbyists convince the Puerto Rican Senate to hire more schoolteachers

Alejandro Garcia Padilla was a special case.

The governor showed great character, and held out longer than everyone.

He finally learned that a Financial Control Board was NOT a good idea for Puerto Rico, but only after the most extreme teaching techniques.

Gov. Garcia Padilla agrees to withdraw his Financial Control Board

The dean of the school, Prof. Leo Machuchal, is scheduled to share his teaching protocols at the Colegio de Abogados in early 2016.

“The bastinado is my favorite,” said Machuchal. “When they’re hanging upside down, they start to get real cooperative…both PPD and PNP.”

According to Machuchal, a special curriculum is being devised for the 78 mayors of Puerto Rico.

2 Comments on “The Edgar Allan Poe School of Government Reform

  1. Reblogged this on It Is What It Is and commented:
    How true … “A new method of government reform is needed in Puerto Rico.
    It seems that politicians in Puerto Rico do not listen to reason.”

    Like

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